


fools

by ImotoChan



Series: blue neighborhood [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Abuse, M/M, Yikes, at least no ones dead, for a short amount of time, homophobia too, im srry friends, its brief but its tehre, there is lil happiness, theres a lil fluff, this is p angsty, yet - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-02
Updated: 2016-09-02
Packaged: 2018-08-12 15:19:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7939504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImotoChan/pseuds/ImotoChan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Iwaizumi doesn’t know what to say, doesn’t know if there's anything to say. All he wants is Oikawa, he doesn’t know if that’s right or wrong, but his entire being <i>aches</i>. He needs to be closer, needs to kiss and touch and feel because he doesn't know how much longer he’ll have Oikawa for.</p>
            </blockquote>





	fools

**Author's Note:**

> heyhey hey this like hella angsty and i hope u like it! warning! there's abuse & homophobia !

Iwaizumi has always known that he loves Oikawa.

 

There really is no reason to try to deny it; he loves Oikawa and Oikawa loves him. Their entire childhood was composed of each other; hazy memories of sunny days and grey rainy days and evenings spent staring at the cloudy dark sky. It made sense, really. They grew up together. Their first pinky promises were to each other. They went on adventures and saved the world from aliens together. It always felt right when Oikawa was there, like his hand was always supposed to be held by Iwaizumi. 

 

And yet--

 

And yet Iwaizumi knows that it isn’t right. 

 

It isn’t normal to want to love Oikawa this way; he knows it because he’s read enough books and seen enough movies and heard enough slurs slip out of his father’s mouth. 

 

It isn’t normal to dream about Oikawa the way he does, to wish Oikawa was always there, always smiling his dumb smile and laughing that lovely laugh. 

 

Oh, that  _ laugh _ .

 

Iwaizumi thinks it’s incredibly unfair how the universe works. To make him meet Oikawa, to let him fall in love with him, and then to not let him be happy; how did any of that add up?

 

So when Oikawa kisses him, when Oikawa runs his hand through his hair, when Oikawa’s hands are clasped tight around his neck, when Oikawa bites his shoulder or giggles into his ear, Iwaizumi tells the universe that he will do whatever it takes to keep this boy by his side. 

 

The universe seemed to laugh at him for saying so. 

 

///

 

“Nngh, Iwa-chan…” Oikawa gasps, curling against Iwaizumi chest.

 

“Just shut up,” Iwaizumi mumbles, not really meaning it. He loved hearing Oikawa’s voice; loved hearing him say his name, in a breathy gasp or a cheerful laugh, Iwaizumi would give up the world to forever have that sound. 

 

(Although, considering Oikawa was his world, Iwaizumi doesn’t think he’d give that up for anything)

 

“A-ah, Hajime!”

 

Iwaizumi loves it when Oikawa says his name. 

 

“Tooru,”

 

He hopes Oikawa loves hearing him say his, too.

 

///

 

“And then, Nee-chan whacked him with a broomstick! Can you believe that? I guess he was being an asshole, but still! Anyway, I’m glad she dumped him, he was a prick.” Oikawa laughs, shaking his head. 

 

Iwaizumi hums in agreement, “Mm, I didn’t like him much, either.” 

 

Oikawa nods, yawning as he rests his head on Iwaizumi shoulders. He giggles when Iwaizumi turns his head to face him. 

 

“Hey, there.” Iwaizumi mumbles, ruffling Oikawa’s hair. 

 

“Hi, Iwa-chan.” Oikawa smiles sleepily and Iwaizumi chuckles, wrapping an arm around the boy and pulling him into his chest. 

 

“Comfortable?” Iwaizumi asks, nuzzling Oikawa’s hair with his nose. It was soft, as always, and smelled like the bakery down on Main street. Cinnamon and caramel, Oikawa’s two favorite flavors. Iwaizumi prefered dark chocolate, and Oikawa always shook his head when he would order something with the bitter pillow. 

 

“Mm, Iwa-chan makes the best pillow.” Oikawa hums, eyes staring up at him. The stars are bright and beautiful in the sky but Oikawa prefers watching Iwaizumi. He always seems to glow, like some ethereal being, 

 

Iwaizumi rolls his eyes, snorting, “Thanks, Oikawa.”

 

Iwaizumi hums quietly, and Oikawa recognizes the song. He smiles, singing the words in broken English--

 

“ _ Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket, save it for a rainy day. _ ”

 

Iwaizumi chuckles, finding Oikawa’s indignant huff endearing. “Like Iwa-chan could do much better.”

 

Iwaizumi shrugs, “Probably could.”

 

Oikawa nudges Iwaizumi gently in the side, grumbling as he snuggles into Iwaizumi side.

 

“ _ Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket, never let it fade away _ .”

 

Iwaizumi’s voice is gently and has a raspy quality to it that goes unchanged, even when he;s singing in a different language. Oikawa buries his face into Iwaizumi’s chest, unable to suppress the smile on his face, “Okay, fine, maybe Iwa-chan is a better singer.”

 

(Oikawa really doesn’t mind.)

 

Iwaizumi laughs quietly, kissing the top of Oikawa’s head, “I love you, Tooru.”

 

Oikawa yawns, smiling as he inhales the scent that is so unmistakingly Iwaizumi--

 

like the forest after it rains, musky and warm--

 

“I love you, too, Hajime.”

 

///

 

“Iwa-chan?” Oikawa is looking up at Iwaizumi with wide eyes, concern filling the hazel pools. 

 

Iwaizumi doesn’t say anything, just kisses Oikawa’s cheek. 

 

“What’s wrong? Why aren’t you saying anything?” The desperate tone of Oikawa’s voice makes Iwaizumi chest ache. 

 

Another kiss, this one on the nose; One more on his forehead, a trail of them starting at the nape of his neck, going down to his belly button. 

 

“Iwa-chan, I’m worried.” Oikawa runs his hand through Iwaizumi hair, his lower lip trembling. The bed creaks silently as Iwaizumi moves. 

 

Iwaizumi doesn’t know what to say, doesn’t know if there's anything to say. All he wants is Oikawa, he doesn’t know if that’s right or wrong, but his entire being  _ aches _ . He needs to be closer, needs to kiss and touch and feel because he doesn't know how much longer he’ll have Oikawa for. 

 

“Please, Tooru.” Iwaizumi murmurs, coming back up to kiss his mouth. “please.”

 

Oikawa can taste salt in the kiss and he can’t tell if it’s from his tears or Iwaizumi’s; he stops asking questions after that. 

 

///

 

“I know why you’re spending all the time with the Oikawa’s kid! I don’t like it! His parents might be okay with having a queer son, but I won’t stand for it!”

 

“Dad, you’re overreacting---”

 

“I know what I know! If you don’t quit it--” Iwaizumi dad glares at him, “--If you don’t quit it, I’ll kill both of you.”

 

Iwaizumi fist tightens but before he can react his dad slaps him, “That’s the end of it.”

 

“I love him!” Iwaizumi shouts, his jaw shut tight. 

 

His dad grabs the collar of his shirt and pushes him against the wall, “I won’t have it.”

 

Iwaizumi swallows, shutting his eyes for what comes next. 

 

A fist to the face, a kick to the shins, another punch in the ribs--

 

His dad spits in his face before leaving the room, leaving Iwaizumi clutching his chest, whimpering.

 

///

 

Iwaizumi sees Oikawa from his window. He jumps out of bed and runs to him, ready to yell at him for coming here. 

 

“Iwa-chan! There you are! Are you okay?” Oikawa’s looks worried; hazel eyes wide with concern. His gaze lands on the large bruises on Iwaizumi’s eyes and his frown deepens. 

 

“Why are you here?” Iwaizumi hisses, “Leave.”

 

“Huh? Iwa-chan?” Iwaizumi hates the look of hurt in Oikawa’s eyes. 

 

“I said, leave!” Iwazumi points towards the gate, “Please, Tooru.”

 

Oikawa tries to reach for Iwaizumi, tries to embrace him or kiss or get him to stop looking so scared but Iwaizumi just shakes his head, “Go! Leave!”

 

“Iwa-chan--”

 

“Tooru!”

 

Oikawa doesn't say anything more; he watches as Iwaizumi shakes off his hands and walks back towards his house. 

 

///

 

Oikawa has always been a wanderer.

 

Iwaizumi used to say he was senseless; that one day he’d get so lost he wouldn't be able to make it back home. Oikawa had laughed, saying that as long as Iwaizumi was wandering with him he would be fine. 

 

Oikawa understand, he knows why Iwaizumi has to do the things he does, but it hurts. It hurts that maybe Iwaizumi doesn’t love Oikawa as much as Oikawa loves him. 

 

Maybe Oikawa was a fool; he was young and love is fleeting, maybe Iwaizumi never meant any of it. 

 

(Oikawa knows this isn’t true, but it’s his way of trying to understand the unfair universe). 

 

Oikawa knows Iwaizumi meant it, every kiss, every hug, every “goodnight, i love you”, every “good morning, dumbass”, every laugh , every roll of the eyes, every smile--

 

That’s why it hurt even more.

 

The universe was so utterly unfair and Oikawa hated it. 

 

Oikawa had always been a wanderer,

 

but Iwaizumi was his home. 

 

///

  
  


“I see you’ve got a girlfriend,” Iwaizumi dad stands at the door of his room, a small smile on his face.

 

“Yeah,” Iwaizumi mumbles, not looking up from his desk.

 

“What’s her name?”

 

“Shimizu,”

 

“Will I get to meet her?”

 

“Maybe.”

 

“I love you, Hajime.” Iwaizumi dad almost sounds sincere; Iwaizumi wants to believe the words. 

 

“Yeah, I know dad, I love you, too.” Iwaizumi wonders if he means them when he says it. 

 

Iwaizumi misses Oikawa. 

 

///

  
  


Oikawa knows that Iwaizumi is dating someone new. 

 

Perhaps “new” isn't the correct word; were Iwaizumi and him ever even dating to begin with? 

 

Weren't they just kids, anyway? Kids with too much time on their hands: too much time to be carefree and do something as reckless as fall in love.

 

Oikawa wants to be the one Iwaizumi kisses in public, wants to be the one whose hand Iwaizumi holds as they walk down the street, wants to be the one for Iwaizumi because Iwaizumi is, he always has been, the one for him. 

 

Oikawa misses being little kids; when their days blurred together, when all the time was spent laughing and smiling and sometimes crying (but at least they were together), when loving each other wasn’t something to be afraid of. 

 

Maybe none of it was real, maybe OIkawa could just never be loved--

 

God, Oikawa was such a fool.

 

///

  
_ only fools fall for you _

**Author's Note:**

> thank u sm for reading! the last part of this series should be done soon, i wont take months again ahha (nine months was it?? my bad..)


End file.
